Listen up kids, THE RIDE is here to give you all the down low on shopping in the city. I know you’ve been ogling that Louis Vitton handbag and Rolex on the internet for quite some time. You’ve heard the rumors about finding sweet knock-offs on Canal Street for a fraction of what the real items cost. And being that you’re in town, you’re ready to go hand a random person some cash so you can feel like royalty. That’s totally okay, but there are a few things to keep in mind before heading out there and spending up all that hard earned cheddar.
Canal Street is a cash only atmosphere. You want to be sure to bring enough cash to buy those cool things on your wish list, but not so much that you’re rifling through a stack of twenties to buy a three dollar origami corn husk. Keep your cash concealed as much as possible. You remember my friend Frank, the garbage truck? There was one time he was buying a set of knock-off rims and had negotiated the guy down from $300 to $225, but when he went to pay he pulled out three $100 bills. Needless to say, he ended up paying the full price. Carry small bills so you don’t end up like Frank.
Just because THE RIDE provides you with an amazing experience without you having to ask, doesn’t mean this applies to the shop keepers on Canal Street. They’re not going to put all of their best stuff out on the street for anyone to grab willy nilly. You can ask if you have a specific brand in mind. You should be prepared to be escorted into a back room where you can pick and choose from the cream-of-the-knock-off-crop. Make sure you inspect the goods before purchasing, as most places have a strict “no return policy.” It’s also okay to say, “No thank you,” if you don’t like anything.
Last, but not least, haggle like you’ve never haggled before. The shop keepers expect to haggle, and believe me, they’ll let you know when you’ve hit the low limit. A little trick I picked up living here is to sway them to give you a bundle deal. They want to move merchandise and you want to have sweet products so your friends will think you’re cool. For instance, I was able to pick up four pairs of wiper blades for the price of a pair in a real store. They didn’t really keep the rain out of my eyes, but what a deal!